Kim Jong-il Promises Incredible 4th of July Show for Hawaii Residents

North Korea's leader, Kim Jong-il, is urging residents of Hawaii to get their cameras ready and gather on July 4th at the lookout point for the Kilauea Volcano on the Big Island of Hawaii.

The statement released by North Korea's official news agency said, "Our Dear Leader will demonstrate the awesome capabilities of our military by launching a long-range ballistic missile and putting it directly into the middle of the crater located at Hawaii's Kilauea Volcano. We will both demonstrate our capabilities and give a nice show to Hawaii residents on the 4th of July. The missile will not be armed but the splash of lava should be spectacular. We expect the missile to be immediately destroyed by the lava which will eliminate any possibility of the imperialist spies of United States stealing our superior technology."

The official statement concludes by saying, "This is our gift to the United States and should be received as a gesture of our goodwill. Any attempt to shoot down this missile of peace will be considered a an insult and will have grave consequences. Boredom is the enemy of man and sometimes our Dear Leader likes to have a little fun. Our Dear Leader poses the question, What kind of world would this be if we couldn't launch a long-range missile towards the U.S. every now and then?"